over the past 96 hours, i've imbibed five Starbucks Gingerbread lattes (it's that time of year), cried three times (twice due to stress, once due to post-Thanksgiving family dysfunction), slept thirty hours, had three interviews (two for me), fell behind in two classes by an additional week (that makes three weeks total), had zero drops of alcohol (maybe that was an issue) and attended one ten-year high school reunion.
reunions are depressing. they're surreal, fake, and awkward. just like high school itself. in the end, they’re just re-enactments of the past--you ignore those you dislike (or think you dislike) and are ignored by those who are stupid enough not to see how fabulous you really are. whatever. i’m over it. sorta. but really, why does anyone ever want to go back? to re-live past glory? that's just pathetic. re-connect with old friends? c'mon, get real. if you were truly good friends in the first place, you wouldn't necessarily need to re-connect, now would you? personally, i think its just a way to satiate our morbid curiosities...to answer the question of did that Pretty Girl get fat? is the star soccer player still an asshole? are the blondes still blonde? yes. yes. and yes-- but more like bottled blondes. ha.
worst yet, people use reunions as a medium to flaunt their achievements—usually in the form of a wife or husband or baby. and no matter how much i’ve evolved or accomplished, having no Significant Other to show off made me sad, i felt just a little inferior to these “former friends” of ten years ago. although i may not be one of those that got fat, old or bald--and Thank Goodness for that—its shitty to be reminded of all the things i don’t have…that no matter how far i run away from high school, i can’t out-run time. yes, it’s all in my head and we’re not all suppose to be on the same schedule. but perhaps that’s the whole point of high school anyway. its just a competition to see who got where first and who fell behind. and right now, i feel very behind. and i have no idea what to do about it. well, i guess i can get drunk. there. Problem? Solved. heh.